Challenge: Am I ever going to feel comfortable spending time with his guy friends?
Solution: Make friends or make cookies.
The Super Bowl is almost here and everyone is making plans for the big day. If you are dating, it’s usually the big day to get together with him and his friends. Sometimes hanging with the guys is a perfect fit and sometimes it’s just downright uncomfortable.
I have had many different experiences in this arena. In the past, I have dated guys whose friends were great to be around but I have also had a few experiences with friends who were a little too friendly. Awkward! There are guys who want what they don’t have so flirting with their buddy’s girlfriend comes easy. While it can be tempting to flirt back, it can also lead to big problems. You don’t want to be the cause of your man and his friend having a blowout. I have found the best way to neutralize the situation is to laugh it off without making it a big deal.
There are few things that I will admit guys do better than girls, but I must say, that maintaining friendships may be one of them. Bros are thick as thieves. They may not admit it, but they are totally tied to their bromances. They formed a bond well before you arrived on the scene (literally how is it possible that they are still best friends with someone they met in elementary school??), and nothing you say or do is going to come between that. Rather than fight it, come to terms with the fact that it’s imperative you get along with ‘the crew’.
Some of his friends are going to annoy you (guy who thinks it’s funny to get my boyfriend VERY drunk, I’m talking to you), but for the most part they will end up being your friends too. Men are simple creatures—They’re not going to play games or be dramatic, so it shouldn’t be hard to integrate yourself into the group. When all else fails: bake cookies, and suddenly they’ll feel very good about their friend’s new relationship. But really, if you can make a sincere effort to get along with the guys, it will go a long way with your boyfriend, and make the relationship much more fun.
Let him and his friends go do their thing. Your easygoing quality and ability to let him go out without feeling jealous or insecure will make you even more attractive. Unless he has given you a reason not to, be confident in your relationship and trust him even when he is out partying with the guys.
When you are hanging with the guys, here are a few quick tips to remember:
5 strategies for getting along with your BF’s buddies
- Even when you become friends with his buddies, continue to give him plenty of “bro” time.
- Don’t be afraid to act like a guy. You can certainly get in the mix and feel comfortable drinking beer, watching football or talking about hot chicks. It’s good to be able to hang with them even when the other girls are not around. Instead of being “the girlfriend” they will treat you like their buddy, which can be fun for a few hours.
- When you are all hanging out, try not to flirt with his friends. Its human nature to be attracted to people we cannot have but this attraction fades. You know your relationship is more important so don’t put it in jeopardy. There is no reason to give him a reason not to trust you around his friends.
- Be yourself- your boyfriend is crazy about you so don’t change who you are for his friends. Feel comfortable and confident when you hang with them.
- Build friendships- you don’t just want to deal with his friends, otherwise it’s going to be a rocky relationship. Try to form friendships. Then you will not mind when they all show up on your doorstep for a game
When all else fails, make a batch of chocolate chip cookies. They will love you forever!